theROCK

Our Primary Vocation

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Your family is your primary vocation”?

Full disclosure, I think it’s time to retire that phrase. In my experience, a misunderstanding of what that actually means has created an idolatry of family life. Let me explain.

When the Church uses the phrase “family as primary vocation,” they are NOT saying “your family is the most important call in your life and everything else comes second.” It sounds like that's what they are saying, but we have to understand what “primary vocation” means in this context. Because for the longest time I thought, and many of us think, the most important thing we will do in our life is be a spouse and a parent, maybe even a grandparent. But this is false. You read that correctly. This is a misunderstanding of what the Church teaches.

Our most important vocation, our highest call, is to holiness. It is to be saints. It is to be completely and perfectly united to Jesus. THAT is our primary vocation. THAT is the most important thing we will do with our life. Everything else in life is meant to serve the purpose of drawing us closer to Jesus. Including our family. So when we talk about family as the “primary vocation,’ we are talking about family as the primary avenue God designed to draw you closer to Him. Just as for our priests, priesthood is their “primary vocation”–the primary way God leads them to Him. Our lower case primary vocation is meant to serve the uppercase Primary Vocation of holiness and becoming saints. The vocation is not the goal. It is the way we reach the goal.

But that isn’t how we are often taught that phrase. Instead, we have taken it to mean that God gave me my family and so dedicating all of myself to my family is actually what God wants. And while that is kind of true (please do dedicate yourself to your family), it also tends to mean that we dedicate ourselves to our family at the expense of dedicating ourselves to God. And that’s where we get it wrong. We skip Mass to go to sporting events because hey, that’s my primary vocation right? This is what I’m supposed to prioritize! We over book our calendars, focusing on the kids, not leaving any time for personal prayer. And we console ourselves that “hey, someday they will be out of the house” or “someday I’ll be retired and have more time for God,” completely ignoring the fact that God wants you to be present to Him now, always, in every stage of life.

When we put our family (or career or religious call for that matter) above our relationship with Jesus, we make an idol of the very thing that was meant to lead us closer to Jesus. We must reorder our lives according to the true order: God first and everything else (including our family) after. It is a hard shift to make. But when we put God first, everything else has a way of falling into place.

Identity Crisis

When you were a kid, what did you think it meant to be an adult? Get married? Have kids? Buy a house? Build a career? And once you did all those things, then what? Get promotions? Help your kids get into college? And once those are or were complete, what next? Once your kids are in college and out of the house, how will you define your life? After you retire, what then?

I think the way we have come to define our lives—by these worldly, societal values—has created in many of us a reoccurring identity crisis. We set our eyes on these goals and find life’s meaning in accomplishing them, make our entire identities about them, and once we meet them, then what? Who am I now that I’ve met all the goals and checked all the boxes of adulthood? Who am I now that I’m retired? Who am I now that my kids don’t really need me anymore? Oh…but grandkids!

You see, the problem isn’t that these goals are bad. No, family, job, house, are all wonderful and important parts of life, but they are ultimately NOT what define us as humans. Our life is not meant to be defined by the things that we do. It was defined for us before we were even born: “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you” (Jeremiah 1:5).

I’d like to propose the idea that we as a society, are setting our goals too low. We are looking to the things of this world to define us and give life meaning (family, job, etc.), instead of the things of God. And as a result, we are experiencing tremendous identity crisis.

We were made to be saints. Every single one of us. Pope Francis tells us “The Lord wants us to be saints and not to settle for a bland and mediocre existence” (Gaudete et exsultate, 1). The Catechism of the Catholic Church goes on to say: “All Christians in any state or walk of life are called to the fullness of Christian life…All are called to holiness” (CCC, 2013).

THIS is the ultimate goal for all humans: to be holy, to be saints. That is our true identity. And the makeup of our life – our family, our careers, etc. – are part of that journey to holiness. But they aren’t all of it. You, (insert your name here), are meant to be a saint.

I really want you to sit with this idea. If we set our goals too low, we throw ourselves into listlessness and crisis. Stop selling yourself short. You were made for more. You were made to be a Saint!

The Ambo: Where God Speaks

Today I would like to speak about the ambo. With modern technology it can seem a little strange why we would spend a bunch of money on an elaborate book stand such as what we have here at St. Dominic. It might make sense in the old days for sound to make it easier for people to hear and such, but now it doesn’t make much sense.

That is of course if we look at it from a practical perspective. From a theological perspective it makes all the sense in the world and it reminds us that the ambo holds a special place in a church. The word “ambo” means/signifies an elevated or raised area and this is key.

Because the Word of God always descends down upon us. Whenever God speaks it is always from above. Moses goes up to Mount Sinai and brings down the Ten Commandments. Jesus gives us the Beatitudes on a large hill on what is known as the Mount of Beatitudes, the apostles go to the Upper Room and receive the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, and here at Mass the lector comes up the sanctuary to the ambo where the readings, the Word of God is proclaimed and descends on us. 

The General Instruction of the Roman Missal says, “When the Sacred Scriptures are read in the Church, God himself speaks to his people, and Christ, present in his word, proclaims the Gospel.”

I love to think of the readings as gentle rain falling on our souls. Nourishing us, refreshing us, preparing us to receive the Eucharist which becomes the life of Christ within us. So that we may embody what we have just heard and consumed.

That is why the ambo matches the altar, because it is at the ambo where Jesus speaks, it is at the altar where he reveals himself to us. We often hear someone before we see them. The readings prepare us to be able to recognize Jesus in the Eucharist. Without the readings, without hearing his voice, we will never see beyond the veil of bread before our eyes. We will never see that it really is Jesus before us.

I think that is why it can be so difficult to pay attention to the readings at Mass, because God will never shout or force his voice into our hearts. Like we hear from the prophet Elijah God is not in the earthquake but the whisper. We must intentionally strain our ears to hear him. We really have to work hard to pay attention.

And so the ambo is reminder to us that God still speaks to us today. His voice is not trapped in the past, but spoken to us in this very moment. We only need the ears and desire to hear him.